


The Ashton Song

by ChloboShoka



Category: The Letter (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M, Parody, Song Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 09:30:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13831341
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChloboShoka/pseuds/ChloboShoka
Summary: The Gaston Song but with Ashton





	The Ashton Song

Isabella -  Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Ashton

Looking so down in the dumps

Everyone here'd love to be you, Ashton

Even when taking your lumps

 

No one in Luxbourne is as admired as you

You're everyone's favourite cop

Everyone's awed and inspired by you

And it's clear why you are on top

 

No one's slick as Ashton

No one's quick as Ashton

No one's pretty fly for an Asian guy like Ashton

 

For there's no man in town half as fluffy

Dorky, a real proper geek

 

You can ask my friends Zach and Rebecca

And they'll tell you whose team they prefer to be on

No one holds hands like Ashton

Spams memes like Ashton

No one destroys kitchens when they cook like Ashton?

 

Ashton -  As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating

 

Cuddles -  My, what a guy, that Ashton!

Send love and kisses

Send hugs and cuddles

 

Isabella -  Bella was here and Ashton is a loser (just kidding about the loser part)

No one sings like Ashton

Creates art like Ashton

When it comes to crime nobody dukes it out like Ashton

For there’s no one as stubborn or horny

 

Ashton -  As you see I have great abs to spare

Isabella -  Not a bit of him’s dodgy or sleazy

 

Ashton - That’s right and I always win in a death battle stare

 

Isabella - No one shoots like Ashton

Snogs hard like Ashton

In a rap battle nobody raps like Ashton

 

Ashton - I'm especially suck at karaoke

 

Luke - Minus ten points for Ashton

 

Ashton -  When I was a lad, I did forty push ups a day

Every morning to help me get strong

And now that I'm grown, I do fifty press ups a day

So I always look good in a thong

 

Isabella - No one talks smooth like Ashton

Saves the day like Ashton!

No one steals other people’s food like Ashton

 

Ashton -  I eat pizza for all of my energy

 

Isabella -  Say it again

Who's the man among men?

Who's the super success?

Don't you know? can't you guess?

Ask his fans and his five hangers-on

There's just one guy in town, who's got all of it down

And his name's A-S-H-T-O-N F-R-E-Y

Ashton


End file.
